Livermorium
They operate with precision, without airs or graces
Investigating the most exciting secret cases;
If ever you’re in trouble, don’t know what to do
Contact the crime fighting duo of ButtPlug & Poo.
A recent such case that springs to mind
Help Sussex University, if you’d be so kind?
Element 116 has been stolen from our Laboratory
A paranormal event? Will make a good story.
Poo jumped in a taxi cab, with least of fuss
And ButtPlug caught – the number 25 Bus.
This is really our thing, a technical crime
We’ll catch the perpetrators in wee short time;
Element 116, from its test tube disappeared
Such villainy incarnate, the researchers feared.
Within the Bramber House, there could be spies
And the log of experimentation – a tissue of lies?
So ButtPlug & Poo, they searched high & low
At any lengths, they were prepared to go.
ButtPlug checked the cupboards and Poo in the bin,
Just look the mess, these test tubes are in?
We frisked all the staff and searched the Lab
The Element still missing, there’s no one to nab.
I’ve searched high and low, said little Poo
Now ButtPlug admits, we haven’t a clue;
Vowed never let a case, off the hook
Of the research analysis, she did take a look.
A solution revolution, began to click
The element’s life cycle, is very quick!
But weight unbaiting this material is unstable,
The heaviest element on the periodic table.
ButtPlug was loathed to launch a moratorium
On life expectancy of the element Livermorium;
But more than safe, now to recognise
It will disappear, before your very eyes.
Fashioned in a zepto, it is then devolved
Only stolen by nature, well another crime solved;
Solutions so astute, from out of the blue
No case too complex, for ButtPlug and Poo.
